The Universe Will Provide

I kind of decided to do yoga teacher training (YTT for short), for what most people think was out of the blue. I have actually been stalking my yoga studio’s YTT program for a few years, but always found reasons not to do it, like time and money. This past year, just before the deadline, I decided not to do it because of a shoulder injury. I had just had surgery 3 months prior, and had a very difficult recovery, so I decided to push it off another year. “Next year”, I told myself.

Well. I’m not sure it was due to the Percocet I was on for my shoulder pain or what, but one night in December I woke up and I absolutely had to apply for YTT training. The deadline was coming soon, but for some reason it just could not wait until the following morning, it had to be done now. So I on my opioid-induced high I went looking for the application, couldn’t find it, and then e-mailed the contact at the studio to ask for the application. I figured that if I were accepted into the program, it would all work out somehow (money for tuition, time, etc.). The next day I completed and submitted the application.

So why did I even want to do the YTT program in the first place? Well, I am a therapist and I wanted another “tool” in my toolkit to help the population I was working with. We can feel feelings in our bodies, they’re called “somatic symptoms”. For example, some people with anxiety can experience migraines or “stomach problems”. Others feel burning sensations going up and down their legs. I thought that yoga could better help me communicate those bodily sensations to my clients, help them recognize those feelings in their own bodies, and give me the tools to help me help them relieve those symptoms.

Little did I know I would gain so much more.

I met with the contact and was accepted into the program! I was elated! I only had one concern. Remember that shoulder surgery with the difficult recovery? I ended up with frozen shoulder and needed another procedure done. I couldn’t even lift my arm to a 90 degree angle with my shoulder. I couldn’t do most yoga poses. I couldn’t even do a simple yoga pose like downward facing dog.

In fact, I honestly thought that my shoulder would never get better. Ever. I’m not even kidding when I say that if someone at my gym asked me how my shoulder was doing, I’d burst into tears and excuse myself to go to the restroom; I couldn’t even talk about it because I was so upset by this. Forget yoga, I thought I’d never even be able to do things like wash my hair with two hands, style my own hair, or even throw a ball for my dogs ever again with my right hand. That injury, surgery, and recovery took that much of an emotional toll on me.

My YTT teachers assured me that things could be modified for me to be able to participate, and they were incredibly helpful in helping to find alternative poses that I was able to do.

I am so glad that I went through with it, because after my second procedure my physical therapists attributed my recovery to of course the insane amount of physical therapy I had to do, but also to the yoga I had been doing to supplement my recovery. Little by little I was able to do more and more of the poses until I did not even need to modify them anymore.

I no longer work in a clinical setting, so my original reason for entering the YTT program became moot for at least the time being. I thought that I would still have that tool in my toolkit should I ever return to a clinical setting and treating patients, so not all was lost. Then I was approached by both of my gym owners at separate times, with each of them asking me if I would be interested in teaching a weekly yoga class at my gym once I completed my yoga certification. I was elated, as I have a lot of respect for both of these men, I love my gym and I would love to be a part of the team there so I said “yes”. I am also now in the negotiation phase of perhaps teaching a weekly class at another gym. So you see, not all was lost, as the universe saw a need and provided for that need.

Life has an interesting way of doing things sometimes. I’ll never know why I woke up that night and absolutely had to have that application completed right then and there, after I had already resigned to the fact that “maybe next year” I should do it. Be it divine intervention, intuition, or even just a Percocet high, I am so incredibly thankful that I listened to that “voice” that night and took that initial step of submitting the application. Not only did I get what I was seeking in clinical terms, I gained some mobility in my shoulder back, a greater confidence in my physical capabilities, a greater confidence in my teaching skills, a greater confidence in my public speaking ability, friends and mentors that I know I will keep in touch with for the rest of my life, and a new passion.

So in short, listen to your instincts, that voice is usually right. If it’s right for you, the universe will find a way to provide.

~Namaste